Teenager Uses Noise-Cancelling Headphones At The Dinner Table, But Her Family Says She’s Being Super Rude
I have a particular form of synesthesia (a general term for a cross-wiring of senses or perceptions), called hearing-motion.
It’s pretty much what it sounds like; when I see things move around, I hear corresponding noises in my head, involuntarily.
It’s been that way my entire life, so I barely notice it most of the time, but sometimes, it can lead to being really overwhelmed in a way that’s hard to explain to the people around me.
That’s what I was thinking about as I sympathised with this story.
Ok so, I’d like to preface this by saying that I (14F) have very good hearing. I would say it’s better than average, which is strange because I tend to listen to a lot of music.
Of course better-than-average hearing can be great sometimes, but it can also be a pain.
Especially considering the fact that I am very VERY sensitive to chewing noises.
They truly disgust me and this problem has been a real touchy subject in my family.
I’ve told my parents about it before but they usually write it off as me being extra sensitive because I haven’t eaten enough that day or something (which I can partially understand, but I’m always sensitive to it).
It’s not TOO much of an issue back at home because our dining room table is pretty big and there’s only ever about 3 or 4 of us there total.
I usually sit at the end of the table, only next to one other person.
I sometimes sneakily cover my ear to help muffle the noises.
I am always able to still participate in conversation.
It sounds like what she’s describing is misophonia, which is a fairly common and medically legitimate phenomenon.
For some people, it can be severely troubling.
Flash forward to this summer, where we are staying with a relative. (There are 5 of us total.)
He, as well as most of my family, is a very loud talker and an especially loud chewer.
The dining room table we sit at here is also slightly smaller.
The noises have been pretty overwhelming and I am now sitting with people on either side of me and across from me.
Sometimes it gets so irritating I feel I must excuse myself to the kitchen.
I would also like to make clear that I am not willing to tell anybody in specific that they chew too loudly.
I am not good at confrontation and even if I was, I think that that is extremely rude and my discomfort shouldn’t be made anybody else’s issue.
I want a polite and sneaky solution to this problem.
She started planning.
So, the other day, I had a great idea. I sneakily put my AirPods into my ears (no music playing of course) and I covered them with my hair.
I set them on noise canceling and, as I expected, they did the job pretty well.
I could hear less of everybody’s chewing, but I could still hear their talking (as I said, they all talk very loud).
It felt great and I feel like as long as nobody can see them, it’s not rude.
The Cleveland Clinic literally recommends exactly what she’s doing as a commonly effective treatment for misophonia.
But it didn’t go over well.
Recently, however, my mom told me to take out my headphones (I guess she saw them) and I pulled her aside to explain why I had them and that I could still hear everybody, but she got mad at me, saying that chewing noises were something I would just have to get used to and I shouldn’t be immature.
She said it was disrespectful to everybody at the table. So, AITA?
Let’s see what the comments have to say:
Don’t accept a diagnosis from the internet, but you should DEFINITELY ask a doctor about this.
But even if it weren’t a diagnosed condition, what’s the harm?
Mom isn’t being thoughtful.
Here’s hoping she can find a sustainable way to tackle this.
If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.
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